The Month of Love Turned Inward: What is Self-Care?
By Gabbie Pepin
There seems to be a wide-spread consensus that self-care means using face masks and taking bubble baths, “treating” yourself, and taking time away from what is often perceived as an endlessly busy schedule. These are all great ideas, but what does self-care look like for those who don’t find facemasks or bubble baths calming or maybe don’t have the busiest of schedules, especially in this strange year of COVID?
What if, instead of looking at self-care as prescribed methods of relaxation, we break down what it means to simply take care of yourself—your entire self?
Everydayhealth.com says, “Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day.” Is this what you think of when you hear the words self-care? It’s okay if not. It’s okay if you want to take bubble baths and do facials, because it’s time you’re spending on yourself that you may not typically spend. But if bubble baths and facials don’t quite cut it for you, let’s use this definition from everydayhealth.com to think about what might work for us instead.
“Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy”
When we feel good about our health, our self esteem gets a big boost too! What does your body need to be healthy? Is it a walk outside to get fresh air and a little bit of exercise? Some yoga, to keep your mind and body feeling fresh? Food that makes you feel good? Restful sleep to keep your mind and body safe? What does being healthy look like to you?
“Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be well”
I SO appreciate that they specify wellness vs. health here. Northern Life Yoga also promotes this distinction. Wellness goes beyond the physical health that you can see to focus more on our emotional wellbeing. What makes you feel well? What makes you feel happy and whole and safe? Is it mindful meditation for a few minutes a day? Is it reading a good book or taking time for cathartic journal writing? Is it a phone call to someone you love and haven’t been able to see for a while? What makes your mind and your heart content?
“Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can do your job”
What is your job? Is your job something you love, or hate, or do simply to bring in a paycheck? Is your job no longer something you’re paid to do, but rather finding ways to fill a new chapter of your life? No matter what it is, we all need help keeping fresh and vitalized sometimes. What do you need to keep up or to catch up, to feel in control and on top of your work load or the day-to-day? Is it taking a break in the form of a mental health day? Is it finding quiet time to yourself? Is it reaching out to others for help? Is it sitting down to work and checking things off a list? What makes you feel strong and purposeful?
“Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can help care for others”
Are you a parent, grandparent, or guardian of any type? Is your job to care for people or to manage others? What do you need to rejuvenate from a life or career spent in giving? What do you need to replenish your fountain so that you can continue to pour into others? Is it moments or a set day that you let others take care of you? Is it disconnecting from a social world in order to connect with yourself? Where can you let go, even for a moment each day so you can be your best for those who need you?
“Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day”
What do you need to keep going? Life is hard. Life is really hard. It can beat you down and ask too much and suck all the vitality and hope right out of you. How do you prevent or combat that? Think of something that brings you joy. Think of something that gives you purpose. Think of something that makes you feel strong. Think of something beautiful. Think of someone who loves you.
Is having a routine what helps you feel organized? Does making lists give you purpose and control? Is it letting go of things you can’t control and trusting that things will work out even when you’re not holding the reins that brings you peace? Is it connecting to people or disconnecting from people that connects you to yourself? Is it doing something you love: reading, writing, dancing, singing, yoga-ing, meditating, building, skiing, snowmobiling, fishing, or anything else that brings you joy and connection to the self that has to work, and eat, and sleep, and exercise, and be there for others, and do all that needs to be done?
It’s not about prescribed methods of “what to do to be happy,” but asking yourself “what brings me happiness, and how can I make time for those things?” It requires a teeny tiny bit of self-analysis.
Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can love the life you have.
Self-care means taking care of yourself and treating yourself with value and adoration.
Self-care means you know you are worthy of time and attention dedicated to you, and so is everyone else.